Twiharder Blog: Twi-Motha-Fuckin-Burn!

SAY WHAT!

Hey everybody, Justin wins the award for Twilight buuuurn of the week. Nice work Justin! You win a copy of "Robsessed." A documentary of some of Robert Pattinson's finest brooding stares into the camera. The ladies will come a knockin in no time!

Sandra, however, wins the Twilight you should know better than to post something stupid like that you moronic moron award of the week. Your prize? A lifetime of loneliness.

Have fun with that, Sandra.

Twiharder Blog: I Blacked Out and Woke Up Next to a Pumpkin

My friend Shelley, okay we haven't actually met, but we're on a Twilight email chain and that's practically the same thing. Look, I have tons of friends okay so shut up. Anyway, she's clearly gifted in the art of makin' sexy pumpkins. Is it me, or do you want to run your fingers through that jack o' latern's hair? No? Oh I know me neither. That shit is for weirdos. winky face.

Twihard Tuesdays!

As I'm sure most of my followers are huge fans of Twilight (hmmm no that's just you Katie) I am officially starting Twihard Tuesdays.

Today's Twihard Topic (oh the aliteration!):

"It's ok to want to bone this teenager."

No? not okay? Hear me out. Actually I don't need to explain anything...LOOK at that picture. Kyle is even feeling uncomfortably gay looking at this photo. So here's what I propose, the United States take a SERIOUS look at lowering the legal consent age to "hot werewolf." What does that mean? oh I'll tell you what that means. If a dude is hot, plays a werewolf, is in twilight, and is the dude that plays Jacob, we should be legally allowed to hit that with no legal consequences. Sure this probably sets a bad precedent in the wrong direction but who really cares? You could bang teenagers in the 14th century and nothing bad happened to them. Well except the plague, but that only killed the poor.

Today is a Magnificent Day (too much?)

The blog title is true.

I accidentally created a blog trying to follow my friend Katie's (plug: http://flynnandmeg-underoath.blogspot.com/) so I'm just going with it. This is probably a huge mistake that will result in Katie and I not being friends anymore. Or maybe I'm just looking for an excuse to ditch that zero and get with a hero (Tina Fey, I want to be on you). Either way this.shit.is.happening.

I haven't EXACTLY decided what to write about, but that's not important. What's important is that you people will read it and love it. Alright fine...you'll find it mildly amusing at best, but keep that to yourselves. I have low self esteem.