Twiharder Blog: Twi-Motha-Fuckin-Burn!

SAY WHAT!

Hey everybody, Justin wins the award for Twilight buuuurn of the week. Nice work Justin! You win a copy of "Robsessed." A documentary of some of Robert Pattinson's finest brooding stares into the camera. The ladies will come a knockin in no time!

Sandra, however, wins the Twilight you should know better than to post something stupid like that you moronic moron award of the week. Your prize? A lifetime of loneliness.

Have fun with that, Sandra.

Twiharder Blog: Oh Wolfy!

Dear Summit films,

As you and I both know, TONS of people read my blog. So whenever you want to send me my publicity check in the mail that would be super. I mean, I'm just trying to help you guys out here.

   Yours truly,
   A Mediocre Blogger

I've spent a few posts on the vampires of the Twilight Saga, and frankly if you haven't seen my RPattz blog get on that shit. I've even spent some time on Taylor Lautner. But it's come to my attention that one of the wolfpack is seriously smokin hot and far be it for me to ignore such great talent. Ladies and gentlemen, may I introduce to you...Alex Meraz.

Here he is all wolfed up.

And naturally, just in case you want to pic your totally favorite wolfy!

Man, I hope sarcasm comes across on this blog.

Anyway, there's some hot man meat for you. Well, teenaged almost man meat. I think Taylor Lautner is dating that floozy Taylor Swift now. Come on Jacob, she's been through a Jonas Brother or two at this point, and I'm not buying that purity thing for a second. Next thing you know, you'll be raising baby Swift-Jonas and wondering where all your best werewolf years have gone. Take this from a girl who once dated Elijah Wood.

Twihard Tuesdays!

As I'm sure most of my followers are huge fans of Twilight (hmmm no that's just you Katie) I am officially starting Twihard Tuesdays.

Today's Twihard Topic (oh the aliteration!):

"It's ok to want to bone this teenager."

No? not okay? Hear me out. Actually I don't need to explain anything...LOOK at that picture. Kyle is even feeling uncomfortably gay looking at this photo. So here's what I propose, the United States take a SERIOUS look at lowering the legal consent age to "hot werewolf." What does that mean? oh I'll tell you what that means. If a dude is hot, plays a werewolf, is in twilight, and is the dude that plays Jacob, we should be legally allowed to hit that with no legal consequences. Sure this probably sets a bad precedent in the wrong direction but who really cares? You could bang teenagers in the 14th century and nothing bad happened to them. Well except the plague, but that only killed the poor.